“Spring Fever is any of a number of mood, physical, or behavioral changes which may be experienced coinciding with the onset of spring, particularly restlessness, laziness, and amorousness.” (WikipediA)
Yes, dear reader. In case you are wondering… I am indeed suffering from this particular seasonal dis-ease!
Every year, I tend to experience it differently. The symptoms are usually quite subtle and mild, like… I may not want to sleep as much; I may suddenly start to reorganize my socks and shoes for no apparent reason; or, I may inexplicably find myself taking detours through the Public Gardens, entranced by the silent presence of the magnolia trees that are about to burst in bloom around me.
There are times, however, when the fever rages a bit more strongly.
Dear reader, imagine this: I have actually been known to drop everything, declaring to whoever will listen, “I can’t work today! Look! The sun is out!”
It’s not for nothing that schools in Canada tend to hold their most grueling exams of the year during the cold dark winter months. Once the sun appears, no one can concentrate! Not even the teachers!
All this said, I do have to admit, this year’s fever has taken on a life of its own!
It all started about three weeks ago, when I was still wearing my winter coat, scarf and boots… I was busy putting my violin and music stand in my car when I heard “Stayin’ Alive” by the Bee Gees, blasting away from up the road.
“Ah, ha, ha, ha, stayin’ alive, stayin’ alive…”
As the music grew louder, I walked to the end of my driveway to see where it was coming from: and there he was, dear reader! In person! The perfect embodiment of Spring, Disco-style!
I’ve seen this magnificent disco-man-on-roller-skates-with-ghetto-blaster-on-his-shoulder before. He usually comes and skates around my neighbourhood a few times every summer.
But this year, he was early! “Oh! He must have spring fever!”, I thought when I saw him twirling expertly down my street.
Then, a day or two afterwards, my own fever really started to burn. It was the kitchen window that did it. Once I washed it, I had to clean the mirrors…and then, seeing how doing that made everything look sparklier, I started to wash the floors…on hands and knees…scrubbing and heaving like someone possessed! Then, as my eyes could no longer ignore the slight cover of dust on everything, I went to Canadian Tire to buy a heavy-duty duster with long handle to clean some hard-to-reach areas when I spotted something that I had been wanting for quite some time: an extra-slim vacuum cleaner - and it was on sale!
“Whatever you do, don’t buy it!”, says the woman who is passing me in the aisle.
My heart sinks as I’m clutching one of these beauties to my chest.
I then take the time to read all about its many virtues….plus, dear reader - it’s just sooooo cute!
How bad could it be? Really? I just need it for my stairs... Oh! It’ll be fine!!
As I walk towards the cash registers with an extra bounce in my step, I notice two women with defeated looks on their faces waiting in line in the Returns section: and they are both holding one of these super-duper extra-slim vacuum cleaners!
Needless to say, I was shaken back to my senses - the cute vacuum cleaner didn’t come home with me!
But now that my whole apartment was clean and shiny, what was I going to do about my long-neglected carpeted staircase?
I dug out my ancient Dirt Devil from the storage area and decided to try to bring it back to life again.
“You used to be such a good Devil! How come you just suddenly stopped working?”, I hear myself saying to it.
Put, put, put, it went… Then, I thought that I could smell something burning!
I immediately switched the power off and removed the dust chamber, in case too must dust was the problem. But no, the compartment was completely empty.
At a loss as to what more I could do, I started to clean it with a cloth while talking to it again, saying things like: “You used to work so well for me! What happened? Is there anything you need me to do? How I would love it if you could work again!”
I promise you, dear reader - this is what happened: all of a sudden, I heard a dead “plomp” sound and I immediately became engulfed in a thick cloud of dirt and dust. When I could open my eyes again, I saw that a cone-shaped filter that I had never seen before had fallen out from the depths of my old vacuum cleaner onto my sock feet, leaving a small mountain of cat and human hair - and lots of other things that I won’t mention - behind.
Believe it or not, I actually hugged it!
And yes, dear reader! How it works!
So! Moral of this story: next time one of your old beloved machines no longer works for you, try talking nicely to it. You never know… It might reciprocate!